For those who followed my story in March, my LDR did not work out. If I had written this in April I may have been full of rage and despair. But life really does work in mysterious ways. I really didn’t expect to be in a relationship again after a break up, let alone someone else whose first language was also not English.
My current Japanese boyfriend has been living in Melbourne for over 2 years, with the intent to play soccer in the A-league. He came to Melbourne 2 years ago with zero English speaking capabilities, but is now pursuing his Masters at university. We both had just come out of an LDR when we met, perhaps that was why we got along so well from the very beginning.
It is the first time either of us are dating someone from our respective cultures. Luckily, we’re both enjoying every bit of it together. By having the slight language and cultural barrier, we’ve been able to be more patient and understanding with one another. Needless to say, we’ve had our fair share of misunderstandings due to mistranslations. Thankfully we can look back at them and have a laugh at how baka (stupid) our arguments were about. I’m slowly trying to learn Japanese, but it doesn’t help that it is one of the hardest languages to learn!
Would I do LDR again? No. While being in an LDR had taught me a lot of things, to have someone to go home to and hold at the end of every night is something irreplaceable at this stage of my life now. I think it is important to remember that ultimately it cannot be an LDR forever, someone has to sacrifice much more. Apart from the logistical nightmare, there are tedious procedures and processes for visas for your partner to stay in a different country. Something I did not consider seriously or knew about before. I’ve been lucky that my boyfriend loves me and Australia enough to stay. We will share our experience about getting a partner visa in Australia as it happens.