If you’re anything like me, you must’ve spent countless past midnight reading blog after blog about how other’s make a long distance relationship work. Why do we do this? For the reassurance that we made the right decision to make a life-changing commitment with our better half.
Being in an LDR sucks as already as it is. But it’s even harder when my boyfriend is still currently serving out his military duty in the Korean Army. So this means my communication with him is significantly reduced. On lucky days, when he doesn’t have intensive training drills or power outages (which he says happens quite a number of times!) I am able to catch up with for a solid 2 hours.
It’s been over a month already, and the toll of being apart has finally caught up to us. We both have days when we feel listless to do the things we normally would have. My boyfriend loves to exercise. He grew up learning all different types of sports. Before leaving to fulfill his conscription duties, he was training in Mixed Martial Arts (MMA), as he hopes to one day join The Secret Service.
Naturally, it worried me when he told me that for the past couple of days he wasn’t exercising because he just wasn’t feeling himself. He told me that he missed me so much and just wanted to be with me. That night I cried in my car for an hour. It’s painful to know that someone you care so deeply for is suffering. But do not feel helpless or useless.
It is okay to cry. It is also okay to let your partner know how you are feeling. Chances are that you are both feeling emotionally drained as each other. You are both your best support systems because you both understand exactly what each other is going through. Don’t be afraid to ask how you can make your boyfriend (or girlfriend) feel better. At the time my boyfriend just wanted to be comforted by words of affection and love. But remember, that solution may not work all the time. That is why clear communication is important. Especially when English is not the first language for both of you. If you don’t know, just ask.
Words may be enough for him one day and another day it may not. That’s why it’s important to just be honest with each other. Don’t try to read his mind and don’t expect him to read yours. You know exactly what would make you happy. So let him know.